Grocery shopping is an art form, if you’ve had the misfortune of shopping at the local Walmart on Saturday morning you might consider it martial art form!
I have a theory about grocery shopping – it takes an hour to go the grocery store. You can go every day and pick up a few thing or go once a week and get a basket full, but it takes an hour to make the trip. I know some people who go to the store every day, I guess the idea that the food is fresh from the farm, encourages them to spend a hour there every day. I figure the Brussel sprouts are either sitting in the produce bin or in the back room with the cockroaches. Don’t give me an ‘ugh’, you know there are roaches in the back of the grocery store.
A couple of years ago I brought home a five pound bag of potatoes from Fry’s. While dumping the bag into the produce bin in the refrigerator a roach jumped out and in my panic, I grabbed the biggest potato and proceeded to club the little bastard until he quit moving. I removed the bin and washed everything including the potatoes with bleach. The potatoes tasted a little weird, but the family hardly noticed.
Unless you have something going on with the produce guy I can’t see stopping at the grocery store every day. I don’t think it is possible to walk into a grocery store to purchase chocolate sauce, Fritos and razor blades without checking out the deli display, and making a quick pass through the cereal isle. Maybe some of you have more will power than I do; but a quick trip to the grocery store is always an hour.
For years I dutifully cut coupons and filed them in a nifty little wallet. I wrote out the grocery list and noted the coupon items, even identifying the ones that required multiple item purchase. Cutting, sorting, filing and noting the use by date printed in 3 point print. This probably added another hour a week to the grocery event but I have to admit saving $30 on a $100 grocery bill was practically orgasmic.
I’m a friendly person but I have a hard time warming up to a forty something checker who looks past me to make eyes at the sixteen year old bag boy. Honestly I have spent fifteen minutes in the check out line and plastic please were the only words exchanged. I did hear about the Saturday night adventures of the sixteen year old. I really didn’t need to hear that.
I don’t mean to complain but I purchase two half gallons of milk with the same use by date because I can’t lift a gallon container. So why would that cute guy pack two half gallons in the same bag? I’ve tried mentioning please pack it lite and I end up with every item in a separate bag. My plastic bag collection rivals that of Walmart.
Speaking of Walmart, when the new Walmart Super Center opened on this side of town I decided to shop there and drop my gym membership. After elbowing my way through the narrow isles filled with slow moving wide loads, I made my way to the check out counter. While waiting in line I had plenty of time to study the check out system. I can almost hear the Systems Engineers bragging about this major accomplishment.
The first noticeable difference is the conveyer belt, it is considerably shorter than other grocery stores. This means it isn’t possible to get a cart load of groceries on the conveyer at one time. As the checker slides items across the scanner she drops the items into a plastic bag on a carousel. The carousel is soon full of bags with one item each except for the two half gallons of milk, they are snuggled tightly together in one bag. She spins the carousel and maybe adds another item to each bag. The belt is moving again and I have time to add more can goods. It gets tricky when the cart is not empty but the carousel is full. Now I’m beginning to feel like Lucy and the chocolate factory. I scurry from my position at the belt and start grabbing bags off the carousel and running back to put them in the not quite empty cart. When the time comes to use the credit card I have no idea if I actually got the two for one shampoo or the bananas half off today only. I never had a minute to watch the scrolling prices. I plug in my credit card without a clue that I have everything or that I’m not paying twice for the bonus buy mouthwash.
I almost miss the cute bag boy. I loaded fifty pounds of groceries off the shelves and into the cart, out of the cart on to the belt, back into the cart from the carousel. Now they go into the trunk, then out of the trunk and into the house. Next is the sorting and putting away part then there is the cooking and cleaning up part followed by the leftovers and garbage part.
Maybe the 1.9 billion meals enjoyed at restaurants by millions of Americans have more merit than I thought.
I never liked the carousel either, it’s designed for the “average” shopper and there is nothing average about the Bonello pantry. You can live for a week off the canned goods alone ?
I used to make lists, now Alexa does it for me. She even learned to categorize and sort like I like. Now if she could make up a week’s menus and just call the order in,for d livery, that would really enjoy something. Maybe next year….
I have an assortment of little pieces of paper that I think are grocery lists. I can’t read them so I’m really not sure.
Thanks for reading me!
So true. Maybe we should all think about all these new computer sites where you just order meals to be delivered. I see they are getting close to being able to send them via drone, in an hour or so, which drops them at your door. Not sure we should really complain though when I think of what our ancestors had to go through to get a meal on the table.