Monty had carpal tunnel surgery this week. Dr. Siegel is a magician who can  do the surgery with just two tiny incisions and a half dozen  stitches.  The procedure took about twenty minutes, although the prep and anxious waiting was a couple of hours.  Monty is good as new and back to playing his beloved dobro.    

We are very fortunate that the surgeries at the Bonello’s house fall into the category of parts replacement.  Apparently our warranties have expired on moving parts.  We try to keep our sense of humor about the whole thing, by affirming, they are just parts, not gizzards.   

 

 Monty had a knee replaced over twenty years ago and a hip replaced about ten years ago.  Everything went well with both those surgeries so I was confident when I went to have my shoulder replaced five years ago.  I remember the event like it was yesterday. . . . 

The adventure started on Tuesday morning 11/11/14.  Running out the door at 7:15 in the morning. Hard to fathom we did this every day  before retirement. I made one more trip to the potty, Monty was standing at the door tapping his foot mumbling, ‘We are going to be late! ‘  I was pretty sure they weren’t going to start without me so it was OK.  

Check in and prep went smoothly and you will be glad to hear there is not one selfie to share!  According to the doctor, the surgery was a breeze and I was going to love this new pain free shoulder.  The rest of my hospital stay was not what I anticipated.

When it was time to move from the recovery room to a ‘real room’ there were none available, wait, I had a reservation, I know I didn’t just walk in off the street for this event.  When they finally found a room, the little candy striper wheeled me through the door and announced she hated this room, it was the worst.  

I agreed it could use a decorators touch but, like a hotel room, I’m just visiting.  Apparently my roomie was throwing a party and she had lots of guests standing around.   

I wasn’t ready to party and I did need to use the bathroom.  We’ll just pull the curtain . . .wait there is no curtain!  The nursing assistant was helpful but I was holding the IV with my good arm and she was holding me with both of hers, no one was holding the flapping gown. Oh dear, a Kim Kardashian moment and this was no red carpet. I was sincerely hoping the party group included a preacher who chose that moment for heads bowed prayer.    

Later that day a curtain miraculously appeared between the my bed and my roomies. Apparently someone got the word that the guests knew more about me than they really needed to know.

One of the new and improved hospital apparatus is the compression leg things.  They are pads, wrapped around your calfs and operate on a pump to compress and release so you don’t get blood clots. The tubes are connected to a little compressor that runs 24/7, chunk, chunk, chunk.   It is a great system , unless they are also pumping lots of IV fluids into your body and you constantly have to run to the bathroom.  Everything has to be disconnected to make the trip,  What ever happened to bed pans?

Dinner arrived and I expected the renowned rubber chicken; actually I would have been happy with that, but my plate was piled high with lasagna, a bit of salad and a bowl of pineapple chunks for desert. Have you ever uttered the words lasagna and pineapple in the same sentence. YUCK!  Monty ate the lasagna and I attempted to chase a piece of lettuce with a fork in my left hand.  Clearly I should have spent some time training to eat with my left hand.  It turns out salad is a good finger food as long as the dressing doesn’t drip.  

The night was spent visiting with the night nurse.  I couldn’t sleep and she wasn’t too busy so we had a nice visit.  

The next morning breakfast arrived, OMG, pancakes, sausage and eggs, plus a tiny little package of total cereal.  How could anyone just laying in bed possibly eat all this food, I opted for the 37 flakes of Total cereal and was  more than dismayed to see the small carton of FAT FREE milk.  REALLY, they are stuffing all this food down the people held hostage here and then saying, WHOA we better be careful with the milk.  OK I was ready to go home!

Monty came and rescued me and after helping me get dressed,  getting a list of exercises and talking a little walk with the physical therapist we were off for home.

 I needed some real food, so we stopped at In and Out burger on the way home from the hospital. 

It was just what the doctor ordered.

7 replies
  1. Pat
    Pat says:

    Glad Monty is doing well. Can’t believe it’s been that long since you had your shoulder surgery. Once more enjoyed your humorous take on a not so humorous happening.

    Reply
  2. Cindy Lutz
    Cindy Lutz says:

    Another interesting read Carrie. Love your fun take on a very non fun visit to the hospital. Glad to hear Monty is doing great after his surgery.
    Here’s a topic for you. When you keyboard turns your words into something else. I don’t know if it’s just me but it seems to happen more frequently than before. Take care Carrie.

    Reply
    • Carrie Bonello
      Carrie Bonello says:

      Great topic, I can’t tell you how many times I’ve typed something only to re-read it (after it is sent) and realize it makes no sense what’s so ever! Auto correct is a devil.

      Reply

Leave a Reply

Want to join the discussion?
Feel free to contribute!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *