While sorting through the desk I discovered a yellowing newspaper clipping crunched in the back of the bottom drawer.I carefully unfolded the crinkly paper and there was Erma Bombeck’s smiling face. Erma kept the world entertained from her first column in 1960 until she passed away in 1996.
I hope you enjoy this column entitled ‘That TV Commercial is Right:Just Do It! ‘ Dated Saturday, September 18, 1993 but timeless.
by Erma Bombeck
I have a friend who lives by the three-word philosophy: “Seize the moment.”Just possibly, she may be the wisest women on the planet.Too many people put off something that brings them joy just because they haven’t thought about it, don’t have it on their schedule, didn’t know it was coming or are too rigid to depart from the routine.
I got to thinking one day about all those women on the Titanic who had passed up dessert at dinner that fateful night in an effort to “cut back”,from then on, I’ve tried to be a little more flexible.
How many women out there will eat at home because their husband didn’t suggest going out to dinner until after something had been thawed?Does the world ‘refrigeration’ mean nothing to you?
How often have your kids dropped in to talk and sat in silence while you watcheda rerun of ‘Jeopardy’ ?
I cannot count the times I called my sister and said, “How about going to lunch in a half an hour?” She would gasp and stammer, “I can’t.” Check one:“I have clothes on the line”.“My hair is dirty”, “I wish I had known yesterday.”“I had a late breakfast”,“It looks like rain.” and my personal favorite, “It’s Monday”.
She died a few years ago .We never did have lunch together.
Because Americans cram so much into our lives, we tend to schedule our headaches.We live on a sparse diet of promises we make to ourselves when all the conditions are perfect, we’ll go back and visit the grandparents . . . when we get Stevie potty trained. We’ll entertain when we replace the living room carpet.We’ll go on a second honeymoon . . . .when we get two more kids out of college.
Life has a way of accelerating as we get older.The days get shorter, and the list of promises to ourselves gets longer.One morning we awaken, and all we have to show for our lives is a litany of “I’m going to”, “I plan on” and “Someday, when things are settled down a bit”.
When anyone calls my “seize the moment” friend, she is open to adventure and available for trips.She keeps an open mind on new ideas.Her enthusiasm for life is contagious.You talk with her for five minutes and you’re ready to trade your bad feet for a pair of Rollerblades and skip an elevator for a bungee cord.
My lips have not touched ice cream in 10 years.I love ice cream.It’s just that I might as well apply it directly to my hips with a spatula and eliminate the digestive process.
The other day, I stopped the car and bought a triple-decker.If my car had hit an iceberg on the way home I would have died happy.
There is no need to add anything to Erma’s column. I’m on my way to Dairy Queen.